I love Mondays! I'm not like those people who always have a happy disposition no matter what is happening in the world. Sometimes I get down. Last week was lame. It was lame in my business life, personal life and health life. It was just an awful week.
There are still so many things in my life for me to be grateful for but last week really tapped into my doubts. My daughter was sick, I was sick, friends were down, things I had been working on got delayed, other projects got off track and I began to doubt myself. I began to feel that I'm not good enough for my clients, my partners, my daughter, my husband, my friends or for anyone.
What if I'm not as good as a writer as I think I am? What if I'm not that badass trainer, consultant and strategist I have told people I am? What if I'm not strong enough or good enough to complete the projects I'm working on at the level they need to be done? What if it is all lies that I have created in my head and sold to people who believed in me for 25 years?
These were my innermost thoughts last week in the midst of setbacks and a lot of fever. They were ridiculous thoughts but I share them because I believe that we all have them. Doubt creeps in and steals our pride like a shameless thief. I'm 45 years old, smack dab in the middle of a very successful career. After surviving failures and enjoying incredible success, I still have times I feel like an impostor.
If you are young and you think feelings of doubt go away, then I'm sorry to tell you that they don't. I have noticed that with practice, they do come less often. If you are a woman and think we have cornered the market on self doubt, well we haven't. I have enough brilliant men in my life that have shared their moments of thinking they just aren't good enough. And even some of my most accomplished, mature, award winning wealthy friends still wonder if they made their greatness all up.
Well, it's Monday and my fever is gone. I'm back at work writing, working with clients and hopefully being slightly more transparent than everyone is comfortable with.
This is what I know. I am great at what I do. I work hard and I do my very best. When people give me feedback, I owe it to myself to consider their point of view and possibly improve my work. Sometimes they have a point. Sometimes they don't. When I screw up, I take responsibility and I fix it. I am good enough. I know that you are good enough.
Monday represents an opportunity for us to have a great week, to do incredible work and to let someone know that their work really lifted us up in a new way.
EVERYONE has moments of self doubt and experiences impostor syndrome but you cannot let it stop you. You have to listen to the truth about yourself and push yourself forward with kindness. Sometimes the voice in your head is a jerk and you have to shut it up.